Personal Notes
(Disclaimer: bad grammar, conversational, hard-to-follow!) I feel like my blog is becoming like my family scrapbook and getting quite the shaft these days, but I just can’t seem to catch up and write very often. Lately the hour or two I have after the children are down consists of recovering my housework, school planning, emails, or doing some creative unwinding. I really like to knit, read, or draw when it is quiet at night. I tend to knit and draw more in the Winter for some reason. Hibernating I guess. Eric and I have been spending more time at night catching up and talking, too, since the busyness of the holiday season is mostly gone. I am also not taking on any more web projects for the time being because I find it hard to carve out the time and meet deadlines. I don’t want to permanently back away from web design, though, so I will continue to do some light work for a few clients and see what God has in store this year.
Christian home education is calling my name. Granted it kind of sounds like “MAMAMAMOMMY!” right now! But still every day I realize how much more time is needed on my end to make our goals a reality. It is busy, busy, and it’s great to see the wheels turning, to talk about history, to memorize, to get out books, go outside and play, and learn in the context of real life. I love it so much!
I am managing life at home with four small children the best that I can and clinging to the grace of God in every moment. My standard used to be “neat and clean all the time.” Then, after a few children, it was “neat and clean at least in a few rooms and maybe the vehicles.” After this baby I have lowered my standard even more, and I am learning to be a more patient person in general. I used to hear mothers with growing families speak of “those days before I let go,” and cringe, hoping that I would never talk like that. Well, it’s my turn. I’m not saying we live in a dump, but the perfect Pottery Barn lifestyle is not on our radar anymore. I am happiest on the days when I let go of my personal agenda and look into their eyes. I am busy and never feel like the work is done. Sometimes I call it a day and wish that I could rewind, and others give me energy for the ones ahead. I could not be more blessed, though. When I see them eating up their dinner with smiles, when they run around the house and squeal in delight, when they play with baby Shepherd and I hear them verbalizing their hopes and beliefs, my heart swells. I love the moments when my children play with my hair and tell me that they love me. I love when they ask for just one more book, or when they come running into my bedroom in the morning wanting to tell me what was in their dreams. I praise God for the work He is doing in my heart through mothering these children!
Sunday on the way to church Lydia asked if she could go with me first and then go to her Sunday School class. I told her that sure, she could, but since we were going to the later service, there would be no “class” for her in the third hour, just playtime and a movie with they few other children during that service. “That’s okay. I really want to go with you. I don’t want to miss worshiping God,” she said. I beamed for hours. “This is the good life,” I thought.
There’s really no conclusion to this post. I just wanted to share a little bit about what is going on with me. I hope to make my blog look, bless, read better in 2009, but I am not sure when or how it will happen. In the meantime you guys will have to put up with a scattered, not very user-friendly space, but I sure do appreciate your visits and comments! Have a wonderful January!
Home
It’s always good to come home. We got home from a fun weekend with family and friends last night to the cool air, grilled burgers, fragrance of vanilla, and a tad bit of laundry. Spurgeon’s words bring cheer to my heart this morning, and I cling to the thought of my eternal Refuge ordaining this day to be ceased, lived, enjoyed:
“The eternal God is thy refuge.” Deuteronomy 33:27
The word refuge may be translated “mansion,” or “abiding- place,” which gives the thought that God is our abode, our home. There is a fulness and sweetness in the metaphor, for dear to our hearts is our home, although it be the humblest cottage, or the scantiest garret; and dearer far is our blessed God, in whom we live, and move, and have our being. It is at home that we feel safe: we shut the world out and dwell in quiet security. So when we are with our God we “fear no evil.” He is our shelter and retreat, our abiding refuge. At home, we take our rest; it is there we find repose after the fatigue and toil of the day. And so our hearts find rest in God, when, wearied with life’s conflict, we turn to him, and our soul dwells at ease.At home, also, we let our hearts loose; we are not afraid of being misunderstood, nor of our words being misconstrued. So when we are with God we can commune freely with him, laying open all our hidden desires; for if the “secret of the Lord is with them that fear him,” the secrets of them that fear him ought to be, and must be, with their Lord. Home, too, is the place of our truest and purest happiness: and it is in God that our hearts find their deepest delight. We have joy in him which far surpasses all other joy. It is also for home that we work and labour. The thought of it gives strength to bear the daily burden, and quickens the fingers to perform the task; and in this sense we may also say that God is our home. Love to him strengthens us. We think of him in the person of his dear Son; and a glimpse of the suffering face of the Redeemer constrains us to labour in his cause. We feel that we must work, for we have brethren yet to be saved, and we have our Father’s heart to make glad by bringing home his wandering sons; we would fill with holy mirth the sacred family among whom we dwell. Happy are those who have thus the God of Jacob for their refuge!
– C.H. Spurgeon, Morning & Evening
Bring on the groceries!
My absolute favorite grocery store is Publix. All of us have our favorites I guess, and I’ve never really been one to get too attached to particulars. Publix, however, just has so many benefits and little nice things that make it likeable. The stores are rarely dirty or disorganized, and the employees are seldom rude or uninformed. I think, sadly, that is a big shock to find in any retail business these days! The organics are good, the bakery is truly sweet, and probably what does it for me are their generics. For whatever reason I prefer Publix-brand for nearly everything in the store now. I’m sure they have to be outsourcing the manufacturing somehow, but it’s crazy how I just love their stuff. I do wish they had a little more “natural health foods” (and herbs and vitamins), but I only know of a few groceries who sell those anyway.
Tears, Tears!
Well, drum roll please, after over ten years of shopping almost exclusively at Publix, I have found a tempting reason to leave and shop somewhere else. I never thought I’d see this day unless I moved overseas, but Publix, I’m going to have to say good-bye. The reason is simple: my life is kind of crazy right now with four small children, and I dread grocery shopping. Eric actually does most of the grocery shopping around our house because he can whip in there by himself more often than I can, and he’s pretty darn good, too! He hardly ever gets the wrong thing (except, hmm, diced potatoes, honey! hee hee), and he’s fast. Plus, he doesn’t get distracted like me. Anyway, back to my point. Shopping and cooking have become the necessary evils of home-life for us, and we want them to be as pleasant as they can be. I’m just too exhausted to go out late at night, and if there is any way to avoid it, I do.
Well, two of the main grocery chains in our city have recently implemented online grocery shopping that allows us to order online and pick up our groceries at a scheduled time for a really small fee. We can place an order for what we need, drive into the parking lot, call the number, and have our bags brought right to the car. Now that’s good stuff! Talk about making life easier!
Someone Goofed
I’ve learned in my life that I have a problem keeping my mouth shut and pointing fingers, and, according to my husband, I’m slowly managing that sin better every day. But I just have to point the finger here and say that someone messed up at Publix. See, in 2001 Publix piloted the online shopping experience with the introduction of Publix Direct. It apparently wasn’t bringing in enough money, though, so they pulled the plug. Bad move! Made some people mad I’m sure… and made people like me wish so badly they hadn’t done that! I bet they’d be making lots of money with it now, don’t you?! Wow…
Foreshadowing
One of Publix’s former employees had this prophetic statement concerning the decision to stop their online shopping option:
I am also very surprised by this decision because I honestly believe that in 4-6-8 years Publix will be FORCED by demand from customers and competition to DO THIS AGAIN. Starting over will be that much more costly and put them that much farther behind other companies.
–The Screaming Penguin
I think he’s dead on. Now the competition is here, and I wish the folks at Publix were paying attention. Busy families and the elderly are certainly going to start taking advantage of other stores’ online shopping. I know I am! Going next week as a matter of fact. I’ll let you know how it goes. At Piggly Wiggly I can even make my orders up to 45 days in advance! Wow! I can sit down and make out my menus for dinners at home for the rest of the year and essentially “go shopping” before October comes! Wow. What say you, dear Publix? You need to get with it!
I’m curious to know if the grocery stores where you live have implemented online ordering for pickup yet. Do you use them? Have you been satisfied, and has it helped your family? Please share!
Sleep
Sleep is a g-r-e-a-t thing! I always feel like a totally new person after I have a newborn who begins “sleeping through the night.” Despite the fact that Shepherd is a near-perfect baby in the middle of the night, I rise this morning feeling rejuvenated because he slept from eleven to five, giving me a huge gift. Every mom who has reached this milestone with her new baby feels on this day something equivalent to climbing Everest or shaking hands with the President. It just feels plain rewarding, and the work has certainly paid off. This is also celebratory for me, since I feel as though I can actually rise early again without the temptation to start some sort of new caffeine addiction or simply ignore the sun through the window. I am brand-new, at least until nine anyway!
I’m joking here, but you know it doesn’t come without a trade-off. Car rides are especially enjoyable now that our little man is more alert during the daytime. (sigh) Preciously resembling his three siblings, Shepherd now enters the stage of despising his car seat . When he has enough of it, which is usually about thirty seconds after cranking the ignition, he proceeds to work him self up from a grunt of discomfort to an incessant siren wail. I liken it to a teeny pig being pulled by the tail and then chased with a bull horn.
Of course, no one minds.
Har. Har. It really isn’t that bad, of course. We’re grateful for every minute, and that video was taken at the final stretch of a Labor Day van ride that had persisted a bit longer than we had hoped.
A mother’s work is never done, though; now that we are sleeping more at night, I begin the tasks of disciplining myself to retire early and making sure I continue to feed baby more frequently, lest I see a decline from my factory output and reap a negative result. In other words, I’m totally prepared to go backwards and set the alarm to wake him during the night so that I don’t lose the preciousness of having milk for him. Supply and demand!
Today will be a great day. I feel as though I am the most blessed woman on earth, and with Paul I can truly say that I am content. Bring on the day, Lord!
Florida
We had a great visit to FL last week to see many friends from our former congregation, attend a wedding, and hear a fabulous concert from the youth choir. It was a great trip, and I just couldn’t get over how big all of the kids seem to me now! Wow. I didn’t get a picture of the twins and Meredith, but you can see from the picture how much they favor (Meredith is actually not even in the picture – did you do a double-take?!) We were calling them the triplets!
In this picture are my friends Jennifer, Tyler, Emily, and KJ. These women have impacted my life in various wonderful ways over the last several years, and I thank God for them. KJ is a few years ahead of me on the classical home-schooling road, and I learn from her and enjoyed being in her “schoolroom” / home last week, which abounded with joy, life, and most of all Jesus. Jennifer and Tyler were always so incredibly good at inviting us into their homes and cooking meals for us when we lived there. Jennifer even cooked lunch for us on our way out of town Sunday! Their food is great. Emily and I enjoyed seeing each other again as well as the kids, and it’s almost spoiling us seeing each other so much in so little time!
We also spent some time at other friends’ homes, attended a beautiful wedding,, enjoyed the hospitality of Emily’s in-laws who put us up in their extra apartment for the week, and gratefully (and easily!) accepted Emily’s mother’s offers to keep our kids a few times. How nice.
My youth minister, Seth Buckley, told me once a few years ago, “Something I have learned is that the church where God puts you first is always so special in your heart and will never be replaced.” God did not will for us to remain there for more than those three years, but it’s true. We will always think fondly of all of the wonderful people we loved and were loved by while we served there. It was bittersweet to attend worship there again and walk out of the doors after hearing God’s Word preached there and seeing so many of the faces of people we love. I’m glad we got to go, especially since we won’t be traveling any more for a while!
Emilyweek ’08!
Last year I flavored up my blog with a series of posts about my friend Emily’s visit with her kids to town to see us. It was such a great trip, and this past week we had another “Emilyweek” at our house! Actually it wasn’t at our house because we stayed at the beach, which was so much more fun and relaxing. It really was relaxing, even with six children under the age of five – ha! My friend Kristie also came with her daughter Karina. Karina, Caroline, and Meredith were born within three months of each other, so they had a blast playing together during our visit.
I cannot believe it has been a year since I have spent time with my friend! It doesn’t seem that way at all because we talk on the phone or email almost every day. I’m sure you can relate if you have “that friend” who never seems far away because you always pick right up where you left off in your last conversation. Emily is that friend to me. I am so thankful for her friendship that goes beyond smiles, “how are you?”‘s, and birthday gifts. She is a true friend who walks with me and points me to Christ. She has been through so much with me in the last year. If we would have known last Summer what we were going to go through between then and this Summer, I don’t know if we would have believed it! Friendship in Christ, however, seems to stretch to those kinds of boundaries, and God blesses it richly with memories, tears, prayers, and thanksgiving. It is of course nice that we have so much in common, too. We can share toddlerhood tips and cry about the questions we have burdening us as well as share the joy over similar milestones.
I was so thankful to spend some quality time with Kristie, too. Kristie married Jeff, and Emily married Brian; Jeff and Brian are brothers, so they are really close sister-in-laws. They were friends before their marriages, too, so that is really neat! I can’t describe how awesome I think Kristie is. She is one of those rare women who walks with her heart high because she radiates her faith in Jesus. She is bubbly, joyful, energetic, and laid-back all at the same time. She is such a fabulous mom and an encouragement to me. I just love being around her! When I am around her, I think to myself, “I hope I am a blessing to be around like that!”
When Emily and Kristie pulled up on the first night with their kids in the van, I had just put our children to bed. 
We tried to wait in the living room, but their tired little eyes just shut and couldn’t hold out any longer. When they got there, I took Ethan to the bedroom to wake up Lydia and Steven, and they were so happy to see each other!
It was so encouraging to be in a house for five days with our children, laughing and playing, but also just enjoying watching each other be mothers to our kids. 
We have our little ways of doing things differently to be sure, but the thread that holds us in common bond is our love for Christ and wanting our children to love the Lord and enjoy life. It’s just great to be around other mothers who want the main thing to be loving Jesus. Everything else – all the methods and preferences and stuff that keeps those web sites running strong just kind of pales in comparison. I think all of us were truly blessed. Don’t ask how many diapers we changed, though!
Some of the fun things we enjoyed this week were mornings at the beach, watching airplanes and kiteboarders, cooking and trying to get it on the table at lightning speed for hungry toddlers, rocking on the porch, watching movies, Jell-o games, walking on the beach, knitting, playing with shoes, worshipping together at church, flying kites, eating pretzel dogs at the Farmer’s Market, carriage riding, singing with Eric, and staying up talking into the early morning hours. One of the best parts for me was that I put down my camera and let Emily and Kristie take all of the pictures! Oh, it was fun. I pray that we will enjoy many more years with our friends across the miles and that our friendships will grow stronger.
Until next time…
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